Sean Davis the Jolly Joker -
Henry Winter at The Daily Telegraph
There was Gary O'Neil wandering around Portsmouth's training ground car park last week, trying to find his motor. He knew he had parked it there. Must have done. Drove there earlier. But no sign of it. The midfielder widened the search, eventually locating his precious vehicle across the road at Eastleigh FC.
Tracking down the culprit was easier: such mobile mischief had to come from Pompey's resident prankster, Sean Davis.
Every team need a joker and Davis is proving the ace in the Pompey pack. The Londoner joined from Tottenham Hotspur during the January transfer window as Harry Redknapp steeled his side for the fight against relegation.
Davis has particularly lifted spirits backstage. Naturally ebullient, the Clapham-born 26-year-old loves a joke, as his new team-mates discovered. Everyone in the Pompey dressing room knew who the prime suspect was in The Strange Case of Gary O'Neil's Vanishing Wheels. Suitable punishment was required. O'Neil and the boys plotted their revenge.
The following day, as Davis soaked away the strains of training in the shower, the Pompey lads executed their cunning plan. Davis' clothes were removed from his locker: underpants, shoes, socks, the full wardrobe. Just as O'Neil had been forced to scour the neighbourhood for his lost car, now it was Davis' turn to embark on a treasure hunt, clad only in a Pompey towel.
The boys were one step ahead, having nipped outside to find a mannequin to display the garments. They immediately spotted the five-man wall used for free kick drills, a plastic structure with authentic-looking human shapes. Perfect. One of the dummies was quickly dressed in Davis' clothes. Even his shoes were wedged on the feet. At which point, Davis came flying outside, shivering in the low temperatures, to inquire what his giggling team-mates were up to.
Determined to prolong his search, the Pompey boys formed a protective human wall in front of the artificial one. Davis eventually saw through them, and undressed the mannequin as his team-mates fell about in hysterics. Revenge is a dish best served out in the cold.
Such merriment is not quite on a par with the Crazy Gang. The old Wimbledon glee club would have cut up Davis' clothes or put them on e-Bay, but it does reflect the camaraderie in the Portsmouth camp. A team who laugh together off the pitch stay together on it. Such collectivity is crucial as Redknapp's team strive to survive.
As a dressing room scrapping against the drop, Portsmouth sound more confident than Birmingham City, and the team's popular captain, Dejan Stefanovic, now has the upbeat Davis to assist him in keeping spirits - and the team - up.
Positive characters will also be in demand this summer, when England book into their World Cup castle in the woods above Baden-Baden. Even in five-star luxury, a possible five weeks away makes boredom a looming concern. Chirpy souls such as David James, Rio Ferdinand, Jamie Carragher, Joe Cole and John Terry will be worth their weight in gold as a tournament lengthens.
Davis' England ambitions have slid in recent seasons, but he still enjoys a significant role in the end-of-season Premiership drama. If Portsmouth manage to survive, the fun and games of disappearing cars and clothes will have helped foster a priceless unity.